What Washington Needs Is Reality — Wal-Mart Style

Summary

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My children and I were stuck at the Marriott Wardman Park Hotel in the north forty of Washington, D.C. We were stuck there because driving in the District of Columbia is not possible unless you had extensive experience with LSD in the '60s.

This city's traffic flow and design are testaments to what political forces can do. Streets go north, south, east, west, north by northwest, and noreasterly by the South shall rise again. If diagonal streets and no street signs were not enough to make a visiting driver take hostages, the politicos threw in turnabouts, rotaries or whatever, with five streets spinning off them. You circle there until a tarot card reader tells you which street is yours. The street you were traveling will be one-way after the circle. That one way will be the opposite direction you were traveling.

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Extract

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What Washington Needs Is Reality — Wal-Mart Style

My children and I circled D.C. for three hours before pulling into the Marriott. We kissed the ground, handed the valet the car keys, and explained that he would be driving us to the airport or we would badger him with politically incorrect...

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